Why You Should Ask Your Children About Leadership
In many ways children know a lot about leadership
. Children seem to have a gift for telling it as it is - in effect expressing what they're thinking and feeling. My children for example, don't mind telling me that they don't like what I'm wearing or that when I say something they don't agree with that I'm just being 'silly'. Not that I'm suggesting we should adopt this exact approach in organizations.Sadly, in many organisations, truth and authenticity in leadership often missing. Yet when demonstrated, people generally connect with the person in unexpected ways. I would like to share a very simple example with you that has stuck with me. Some years ago I was running a leadership program for a group of 20-30-something banking people - a mixed lot of marketing professionals, analysts, and managers. I asked the question, 'Who do you find most inspiring as a leader?' The reply was revealing - they went on to describe a senior woman (let's call her Christine) within the bank and it was she did that I found to be most surprising. When I asked why they (almost all) had chosen her, they said that on a recent visit to their interstate office, this executive had spent time walking around and chatting to people, asking them what they did and what were there challenges. Expecting them to finish with a heroic leadership story, they said what they found inspiring was that she cared and took the time to talk to them as people.
How do you think her department performed? Exceptionally well in fact. Her style of leadership was a quiet demonstration that in her world at least - people matter. What you say matters, what you think matters - and I'm here to support you. Upon further investigation however, she did a lot more.
Christine did what children do so well - she was real. In developing and leading her 3,000 odd staff, she would focus on positive change by constantly reminding people of why they were there and where they were heading. There we no great speeches seeking to enhance her own status and ego. Instead, she focused on simple yet powerful stories about customers who had received service beyond what was expected and what it meant to them. In fact, she sometimes asked customers to come in and meet staff who would normally never come into contact with customers (usually her own senior people!). She focused on what was working in the business and people's strengths rather than weaknesses. Weaknesses were not ignored but largely extinguished through smart management.
Christine constantly talked about values - both her own values and the stated organizational values. She backed up this talk through constant demonstration of a commitment to the values. For example, in making decisions in her team she would foster meaningful (and often tough) conversations about the pros and cons of a decision, taking into consideration the business objectives, shareholders, customers and staff. Values were used as a touchstone for all decisions. Is this the right thing to do?
Inspiring leaders openly communicate their principles and what they stand for despite its popularity. And most importantly, they model the behaviours required to move towards a high performance culture. They truly walk the talk in everything they do.
Her team always got a sense of purpose (and urgency) from Christine which was infused throughout her department. People felt like they were engaged in work that mattered. And while everyone worked very hard, they could see beyond themselves and were reminded of the bigger picture. Their contribution was recognized formally and informally on a regular basis.
The one key thing that Christine understood was that leadership is about creating leadership in others - not doing it to them. She largely didn't buy into the 'leader-follower' paradigm, with the knowledge that this can create enormous dependence, lack of inertia and underperformance in organisations. Christine and her management team knew that to achieve their stretch goals consistently - year in year out - that they could not afford to manage and lead in a top-down traditional way. People had to understand where they were going and why. Senior management's job was to help create the conditions that enabled people to take ownership and accountability for their results at all levels of the department. Three vehicles were used to do this: by encouraging people to take action at the local level; by providing a culture where it was okay to speak up and challenge; and finally by supporting people to be their best.
Underpinning all of this however was a sense of authenticity. People always knew where they stood with Christine. Far from being a wilting flower, she was not afraid to have the tough conversations. The difference was that she did this in a very constructive way. Her leadership team was also a place where its members knew they could have real conversations - not conversations sanitised by the weight of expectation about how team was meant to have conversations. Conflict was not only managed, it was encouraged. Issues that lay below the surface that could damage the team and the organisation were surfaced and dealt with. As a consequence, trust levels were high and people in the team knew that each person in the team had their eye on the collective, not the individual prize. Christine rewarded this behaviour and actively discouraged individualistic behaviour.
Christine's leadership style also created an atmosphere of commitment. The team got right behind anay decision thatwas made and committed to a plan of action. Even if some people disagreed with the decision, the very fact that they had been heard on the issue allowed them to accept it. They held each other accountable for collective results and didn't tolerate anything less. All the conversations in the team were authentic. She also knew that there was actually no such thing as a dysfunctional team or department - in that each was perfectly aligned to get the results it got. They actively worked on aligning the team for achievement and success.
Christine and her team also realised that they were able to positively influence the lives of those around them, then they would be engaged in the act of leadership, and each of them would be in effect, creating a legacy. Our leadership legacy is the sum total of the difference we make in people's lives. Many leaders fail to consciously craft their legacy, instead leaving it to chance. Christine knew that she wanted to leave the organisation much stronger and self-sufficient than when she arrived. By being true to ourselves and the organisational mission, we set up a foundation for success, which brings us back to children and what they can teach us about leadership. While strategy and vision-setting are important - it's only part of the story. Children can teach us that to be a successful leader we need to be real - real in our relationships, real in how we interact and real about what we think people most need in organisations. Today people need a more humanistic environment where they can be their best in service of business goals and an organisational mission they care about.
Copyright (c) 2010 Phillip Ralph
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