subject: Managing Your Child's Attention-seeking Behavior [print this page] It is natural for parents to make their child feel like they are the only ones who matter in the world. It is an undeniable fact that when kids are young, they need and deserve all the attention that we can give. However, the level of attention that we give our children while they're still young should subside in time as they get older.
Simply put, it is something like this: feeding your one-year old is okay, recommended in fact. But feeding your 10-year old son is not really a great idea.
Parents should learn to slowly break themselves away from their kids emotionally and physically as well. It is not an easy thing to do and needs a tremendous amount of effort and time to fulfill. But every parent must slowly cut that powerful connection between parent and child that lets the former fall into a trap of thinking that their kids are the only ones who matter.
There is nothing wrong with loving your child and caring for her, but when you overdo it certain problems could take place. One possible effect of loving your child "too much" is an ugly sibling rivalry, or if you have only one child, it could turn him into an attention-seeking brat. Aside from that, concentrating all your attention in your kid alone could also impair your child's emotional development.
One perfect example of an attention seeking child is a 10-year old girl who keeps crawling while waiting for their turn at her Pediatrician's office. Obviously, this is an attention seeking behavior and she is very successful at it.
Her mother definitely noticed her, the other parents and kids in the waiting area noticed her, and practically everyone in the floor noticed her every move. But aside from seeking attention, the child is also trying to tell her mother that there is nothing that she can do to stop her, no matter how she whines and how she complains.
So what should you do to put an end to this unacceptable behavior? The answer is simple: change the way you respond. So instead of whining and groaning about your son and what he is doing, ignore his show and do not show any interest in it.
Going back to the example, instead of whining at her daughter to get up, the mother could have gone away and got into her car, on the pretense that she is getting a forgotten purse or bag. Although there is no guaranteed way to treat kids who seek attention, think about it in this manner - "I misbehave therefore I get attention. I want attention therefore I misbehave." Your job as a parent is to stop that cycle, in any way that you can.
by: Katherine Thompson.
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