subject: Relationship Advice : Safe Dating [print this page] If you and your date aren't very conversant with one another, tell the individual you'll meet him or her at the organized location. Provide your own transportation so you are free to leave if it becomes obligatory. If you don't own a vehicle, have someone you trust drop you off and be widely available or "on call" to pick you up if things turn bad.
It is also best to steer clear of being completely alone or being in a secluded place with somebody you do not know well. First of all, you are both likely to be more nervous, which will keep either of you from enjoying the date. Just as importantly, you could be taking a chance on your safety or reputation. For girls, you could be setting yourself up for an attack. For men, you might be setting yourself up for an accusation.
It simply makes good sense to go out with a group until you start to know the other person well. If this isn't possible meet somewhere public where there are a large number of folks around.
Next, do not let anybody talk you into anything you aren't comfortable doing. This is applicable to sexual activity as well as going to places you incline not to go. For example, don't let somebody talk you into going to a coarse club or a sexually explicit film if it makes you uncomfortable. Suggest something else as an alternative. You don't owe the other person a thing, because he took you out.
Your date should respect your needs. If somebody insists upon pressuring you to do things you would rather not do, you need to leave. Just be glad that you found out early the person cares more about his or her own selfish desires than about you, and move on.
Never be nervous about making a scene if it becomes mandatory. If your date is threatening you, hurting you, or alternatively making you uncomfortable, speak loudly and bluntly, to target attention on the behaviour. With others watching, he is probably going to leave, or at the least, back off. Soon after, you must leave so the person doesn't change his or her mind and come back. Just make sure you've an escort to your car or someone waits with you until your ride shows up.
If you want help, don't be embarrassed to call for security or telephone someone you trust to come and get you. Things can get out of control before you realise it, especially if alcohol is involved. If your date becomes assertive or aggressive, or is drunk and attempts to drive, call for help instantly. It is miles better to be safe than sorrowful.
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